Als Student lebt man ja meist ein recht bescheidenes Leben. Es wird in WGs gelebt, in Vorlesungen vorgelesen und ab und zu gönnt man sich eine Tütennudel. Herrlich einfach, das Bier kostet 0,45€ und Studiengebühren gibt’s ja auch nicht mehr. Der Asket ist in seinem Element.
Auch in meiner bescheidenen Klause dominiert die Einfachheit. Die Möbel sind vom blauen Schweden um die Ecke, der Boden wellt sich ein bisschen und das Geschirr ist ungefähr so homogen wie die Leute von Pegida aber nicht halb so homophob wie…äh…ja gut, die Leute von Pegida. Ich bin ja kein Nazihasser, aber…
Doch halt, was muss ich sehen? Ist das etwa….Nein, das kann nicht sein: Wir haben Klopapier. Und zwar nicht irgendeines, es ist auch noch vierlagig. Und flauschig und sicher. Steht zumindest drauf. Moment mal, flauschiges Klopapier ist ja schön, 4-lagig purer Luxus, aber was bitte ist “sicheres” Klopapier?
Früher, als die Welt noch in Ordnung war, waren Taschentücher und Klopapier noch nies- und reißfest, wobei ich mich frage, ob ganz früher dann Taschentücher und Klopapier niet- und nagelfest waren. Also aus Holz. Heute ist mein Klopapier also…sicher…aha!
Sicher ist für mich ja eigentlich eher eine Eigenschaft, die ich von einem Tresor, Fallschirm oder Gehalt erwarte, aber doch nicht von Klopapier. Wie klingt denn das? “Kaufen Sie Klopapier bei uns, es ist 4-lagig, flauschig und reißfest!” – “NEIN, kaufen Sie UNSER Klopapier, es ist viel 4-lagiger und flauschiger und dazu noch SICHER!!! Nichts Schlimmes kann Ihnen widerfahren, solange Sie unser Klopapier benutzen! SICHER ist SICHERER!!”
Das klingt nicht gut in meinen Ohren. Tatsächlich ist der einzige Gegenstand, der meiner Meinung nach mindestens 4-lagig und sicher sein sollte, die Außenhülle eines Kernreaktors. Flauschig muss er nicht sein, wäre aber eine akzeptable Option. Und ich glaube nicht, dass man jetzt deshalb aus unserem Klopapier einen Kernreaktor bauen sollte. Ich würde mich da ganz und gar nicht sicher fühlen, egal wie oft das auf die Packung geschrieben wird.
Ich frage mich natürlich auch, ob die Abrollrichtung eine Rolle bei der Sicherheit spielt. Denn, wie jeder weiß, spielt die Abrollrichtung des Toilettenpapiers in unserem Leben eine so wichtige Rolle, dass es sogar einen Wikipedia-Artikel dazu gibt! Einen Wikipedia-Artikel dazu gibt??? EINEN WIKIPEDIA ARTIKEL!!!! Jawohl. Man kann ihn hier nachlesen! Kommentar des Herstellers:
Unsere von deutschen und amerikanischen Spitzeningenieuren entwickelten und langjährig in der Raumfahrt getesteten WC-Hygienepapier-Abrollsysteme sind universell einsetzbar. Wir übernehmen 10 Jahre Garantie und sollten wider Erwarten technische Probleme auftreten, steht ihnen unser Unternehmenseigener 24/7-Reparaturservice kostenlos zur Verfügung.
Das ist gut zu wissen, falls also euer WC-Hygienepapier-Abrollsystem euch mal versucht umzubringen, meldet euch beim Reperaturservice. Schließlich kann man auch auf dem Klo nie sicher genug sein!
Die vom Hersteller vorgesehene Abrollrichtung ist übrigens “vornüberhängend”. #funfact
Die Werbeversprechen meines bevorzugten Klopapieres:
Einfach schnell öffnen
Sanfte Hygiene fürs Leben
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(Solo Luxus – ich bin extra ins Bad getigert und hab die Packung begutachtet)
Die 4 weichen Lagen sind aber nur für Arschhaut weich, wenn man sich damit die Nase putzt wird die Nasenhaut rau und spröde XD
(Getestet von mir)
Klingt super, dass man es schnell geöffnet bekommt ist natürlich super wichtig, wer hat noch nie dringend Klopapier benötigt? 😀
Also meins ist super auch für die Nase geeignet, aber am Besten sind wohl immer noch die Feuchttücher für Babys xD
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